When we were kids, we’d have a very clear idea of what we wanted for Christmas. In some way or other, it was based on something we thought would make our young lives better: a toy, a book. Something we could own, keep, enjoy.

My mother told me she’d always get an orange or an apple for Christmas. There were a lot of kids in her family, and no money. My dad told me he’d get a clip around the ear.

Times have changed for the better, perhaps…

So as I sit on my laptop drawing up a list of what I want to buy for people, I’m focused on the joy of Christmas, that belief that it’s better to give. We enjoy the warm fuzzy feeling of being thoughtful, organising gifts that we think will make people happy. It’s great watching their faces glow with delight when they unwrap the gift.

When buying presents, I try to support local traders, or friends, or give something I’ve made myself. There has been a lot of spiced rum and quince vodka steeping in my kitchen since October. I try to be thoughtful and give gifts that I think people will benefit from in some way.

Of course, as my dad would say, it’s all ‘a catch penny.’ We invest in the dream of the ideal Christmas, and that means it has to be planned and prepared and paid for. I won’t even start on the adverts – all the food, Dawn French, The Grinch, families around a table laughing and enjoying doing scratchcards together.

It’s not like that in my house…

It always makes me remember that Christmas isn’t merry for everyone. Far from it. If you’re lucky enough to have your family around you for Christmas and if you can avoid all the pitfalls of arguing, and spending the entire day in a steamy kitchen, and drinking/ eating/ watching TV too much, and being disappointed because the kids are playing with the wrapping paper and not the present you spent loads on, then you’ve done well. So many people have none of that. No family, no home, no hope for the new year.

So if I wrote to Santa and asked him/ her/ them for something I really wanted this year, it would start there. A good day, a good year for family and friends, for us all.

Kindness is a biggie for me at the moment. I’m encountering a lot of the opposite in so many places. When I listen to the news. When I experience the noise on social media. When I hear people complaining about things they’ve heard from others, with a modicum of truth or reason, or none at all, and a great deal of judgement and spite and prejudice.

I don’t need to say more, do I? Whether it’s immigration or football or the government or the person down the road, it seems someone has to be judged and blamed and castigated and ostracised.

So for me, what I’d love for Christmas is very clear.

Kindness. Extended freely to all.

Time. To be with the people I care about. Family. Extended family. Friends. Good people I know. Good people I haven’t met yet.

Good health. Let’s take care of ourselves and others.

Hope. The belief that it’ll be fine. Human nature will prevail.

Love. It really does make the world go round.

Tolerance. (Unless we’re talking about tolerating meanness. Then we have to be brave and call it that.)

Calmness. To deal with it all.

So, yes please, Santa. If you’re listening. You can keep the expensive perfume and the jewellery and the cashmere socks. And everything else in that Pandora’s gift box that promises the best Christmas day ever for thirty seconds. I’m more interested in the long term investment for all people, whoever and wherever we are.

Let’s be nice. Share some real goodwill. To one and all.

And, if there’s anything left over, Santa, a couple of books might be nice…

Thank you x