I don’t normally make New Year’s resolutions. I’m far from perfect, but I’ve settled into a way of being fairly happy with the way I am. I eat sensibly, seldom overindulge apart from the odd glass of wine or two in company, and I exercise most days. I work hard, I try to be kind to everyone, I’m very positive. It would be easy to think complacently that there are no new resolutions to be made.
But this year, I have decided that for 2022, my new year resolutions will be to say yes more often, and to say no more often.
I hope that’s not too puzzling. Let me explain. Often I deliberate, I think about things carefully, I take time to decide, and that’s a good thing. But sometimes, it holds back immediate action and then I find myself taking a path I haven’t necessarily chosen for myself. I go with the flow too often. My younger self was much more assertive, impetuous, hot-headed and decisive. I need to find the balance again between the person I am now and the person I was years ago, who would say ‘Get a grip and stop sitting on the fence.’
So, from now on I’ll be saying no to:
- Injustice, bullies, unfairness, cruelty, discrimination.
- People who think they are entitled, above others. I will stand against negativity.
- Opinions that are unfair or biased. Of course, I don’t mean the opinion that everyone is entitled to.
- I will say no if I mean no, rather than trying to please everyone and follow the middle way. Compromise is good, but not all the time and not always at the expense of being true to myself.
But I want to say yes much much more. So, I’ll be saying yes to:
- Love, warmth, kindness, friendship. Hugs, physical or otherwise.
- People who want to help me – I can be too independent
- People who need help. Even if they don’t ask. Whoever they are.
- Going out and having fun.
- Staying in and having fun.
- Sharing equally.
- Invitations – and I’ll invite more people more …
- To anyone who is being kind, open-minded, generous and sweet. And it will all come back in heaps.
- Any creative opportunity.
- Any opportunity to be generous or thoughtful or supportive, surrounding myself with reciprocity and love.
- Stopping what I’m doing to listen to someone else. Proper listening. Not half an ear. Not interrupting or giving an opinion. Good listening.
- Being nicer to myself.
The above lists aren’t finished yet and, of course, I will fail at times. I’m human and fallible and when I get it wrong, I’ll think it through and start again: a grazed knee is only a temporary setback. What I seek, in truth, is a new sense of balance.
I’m a strong person, and I start from a place where I always try to care for others. Positivity is so important, and I try to offer a friendly word and a supportive ear, to be kind and thoughtful. Mostly, the middle way is the best way, but at times it can be the indecisive way. So this year, I’ll be kinder to myself. I’ll say yes to all positive opportunities and seek out even more. And I’ll do my best to practise saying no promptly when it’s appropriate.
It will be interesting to return to this blog post at the end of the year to see if I’ve made progress. So, here we go. Yes and No. Yes, I will do my best to keep to my resolutions and no, I won’t beat myself up about it when I slip up occasionally. I will aim for a year of balance.
I wish you all the best with your resolutions for 2022. It’s time to move forward.
Happy New Year to you all and may you be blessed with health, happiness and love.